Welcome to my new blog location! If this is the first time you’ve found me, you can check out my old blog here.
I want to start this new blog with a really long post about how we treat people who have beliefs that differ from our own.
Up until midway through college, I had a very difficult time being around anyone who challenged my beliefs. I wasn’t secure in them, and I didn’t know how to be. I only knew that I believed what I believed. Why I believed it… well, mostly it was because it just felt right. But when you’re having to defend yourself against arguments or doubts that other people inevitably stir up, mere feelings make for very poor foundations.
Eventually I examined each of my beliefs one by one. I asked myself a lot of questions and did a lot of research. Besides digging through the Bible, I went to websites, libraries, friends, and the general public for answers. By comparing information I got from different sources, I was finally able to form my own conclusions about why I believe what I believe.
It’s something I still continue to do. Mostly I rely on the Bible, because I believe it is true and perfect. But sometimes I don’t understand it, so I have to get help.
Since I’ve taken the time to examine my beliefs, being around people who have different beliefs doesn’t scare me anymore. I actually enjoy it, because it’s an opportunity to learn and to examine myself. And since I can enjoy it, I can behave in a pleasant way, even in the midst of a theological or political discussion.
This presents a problem, though. I have noticed that if you are pleasant to people, they generally assume that you believe the same things as them. If you happen to believe something different, it can sometimes make things awkward when you finally get around to discussing your beliefs.
I try to always take this stance: That the Lord created all of us with the ability to believe whatever we want to believe, so I can’t judge anybody for exercising that freedom any more than I can judge a flower for having green leaves. The people themselves are more important than their dogmas. At the same time, I believe that certain things are true and other things are false, and I’m not going to change what I believe just because it may make some people uncomfortable.
It’s a difficult balance that is important to maintain. You can’t force your beliefs on anyone, but you can’t compromise for the sake of anyone, either.
So mostly I just try to understand what the other person believes. If I don’t understand, I ask questions. But sometimes this can be problematic, too, especially if the other person hasn’t taken the time to understand the Why of their beliefs.
One time I had a conversation with a girl who didn’t believe in evil. I liked the girl very much, but I didn’t understand her viewpoint. I had been raised in a religious family, so the concept of evil was second nature to me. So I began to question her, in a friendly but persistent way, about what she believed.
It’s been a while, so this isn’t accurate, but the conversation went something like this:
“So you don’t believe in evil?”
“No.”
“You mean you don’t believe in labeling someone evil, or you don’t believe in evil as a concept?”
“I don’t believe in evil at all.”
“At all?”
“No.”
“What about baby murder? You wouldn’t call that evil?”
“What?”
“What about the holocaust? What about rape? If it’s not evil, what do you call it?”
“Look, I don’t think evil is anything more than a concept to use for stories. You’re not going to convince me that evil exists, so just drop it, okay?”
“…okay. It’s just weird to me.”
“Well, I don’t want to talk about it.”
I came off looking like a bad guy, even though that was never my intention. And that’s just the thing. You can only be responsible for yourself. You can’t let it bother you if someone else doesn’t like you because of your beliefs. You have to just let it roll off your back. I mean, why do you have your beliefs? Because you want people to think you’re cool?
Just treat people better than yourself, and don’t compromise, and don’t be afraid to ask questions. If more people would do that, we would have so much greater of a country.
We weren’t given spirits of timidity, but we also dont’ want to bible thump anyone. This is a problem at first, but as you (a general you, not directed towards you personally) mature you begin to understand, people are just too bloody sensitive! If what we believe is true, of course we should be loving, but we should never be worried about offending someone because of our beliefs. Otherwise we become periously close to becoming luke warm… what a horrible state.
I’ve been going through Judges and I and II Samuel lately… Dude, we are such wusses now a days! It’s hard for me to even comprehend Samuel’s, Gideons, Davids’ intesity. It’s almost a foreign concept. We are too afraid of offending someone, or looking bad, or messing up, or looking like the bad guy and we completely forget… WE ARE MEN OF GOD! We are WARRIORS…. Shoot, look at Paul, or even Jesus, they sacrificed nothing to attract people. It’s not about being an attractive religion, but one that is actually true, authentic, substantive and yes even demanding. If it’s not demanding, then what use is it to anyone? If God doesn’t require submission, repentance or change, then why bother?
All that being said. We totally shouldn’t be afraid to be around unlike minded people. But we shouldn’t be scared or worried about offending or running those people off either. Teddy Roosevelt said it best… “Speak softly, but cary a big stick.” Words of wisdom!
David I agree completely with you. We need to be loving and sensitive to others, but there also comes a time to make a bold stand, even if that means looking like the bad guy. Jesus looked sooo much like the bad guy that he was murdered. Same with John the Baptist and all the disciples, and surely none of these men lacked love?
I’m more concerned with being rolled over and pacified in the name of tolerance when we should actually be making a righteous stand when its needed. I think our culture has nearly emasculated the church. We are just too bloody scared! The first century christians were martyred and murdered. And we sit here worrying about offending suzie at the coffee shop or joe our coworker… I for one, am sick of it!
but that’s just my two cents… ( i hope you pick up on the contracition of that)
ammendum…
When i said we shouldn’t be afraid of offending people or running them off… i mean our beliefs… or idealogy… our concept of right and wrong and all of our biblical truths.. if these offend someone or run them off, then we didn’t mess up, we stood firm! We did exactly as we were instructed…
Sometimes people just need to be told “You’re wrong!” of course you should always try to find the most tactful way of saying so, but never at the sacrifice of the message coming through as “you may or may not be wrong, whose to say?”
Okay, sorry not trying to hijack your blog… I like it better than blogspot!!!
No, man, I agree with you. Sometimes people do need to be told, “You’re wrong.” I completely believe that. What I was trying to get across in my blog (and I don’t think I did a very good job) is that there’s a balance you have to hit. If you go around saying, “you’re wrong” all the time, you forget that these are actual people you’re talking to, who need to be loved no matter what they believe. But at the same time, you have to stand up for what you believe, and if it means people get offended, that’s unfortunate. I absolutely think that truth is truth, and there’s no way around that. Truth offends people, but it’s not MY job to offend people. It’s my job to present the truth as lovingly as possible. The truth is already painful enough.
Yes yes, very well said!
Careful, Dave. You may end up sounding like me!
Excellent art.